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Beach Ratio of Dogs to Humans Now 1:1


BDWK AREA - The population of dogs in The Beach area has reportedly reached 40,000 dogs, matching the number of local residents. With poodle combinations enabling even the most allergy prone locals to get there hands on a new friend, the dog count has grown to record breaking numbers.

“I’m not a dog walker, these are mine”, proclaimed Beacher Allison Turcot when questioned about her affiliation with the nearby 5 golden retrievers. “They just understand me better, ya know”, she reasoned before running to stop one dog from humping an innocent black labrador sniffing around Leuty Lifeguard Station.

One thing is for sure, not everyone is ecstatic about the local dog boom. Cats have been leaving an elevated number of mouse carcasses at the backdoor in protest. When questioned, Mrs. Walters, a proud owner of 12 cats (and counting) merely shook her head and walked away.

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