Neville Park Street Car Short-Turning at Kingston Road because Fuck You
Laughing about how he sometimes puts the Neville Park indicator up just to crush the spirits of his passengers, Streetcar operator Ken...
Realtors extend Upper Beach area as far North as Keswick Ontario
According to leading economists, the current housing market in Toronto combined with a high demand to live in "The Beach" has caused...
Water Treatment Plant to Finish Construction Ahead of Schedule, May 2050
“We are proud to announce the finalized completion date of the R.C. Harris Water Treatment Plant,” boasted Toronto Public Works...
Area Woman Questions Entire Existence After Realizing She Doesn't Mind New Condos
SWANWICK - Cupping her now gaping mouth, wide-eyed Kendra Powell began questioning her entire existence after admitting she didn't mind...
Public Shaken After Local Mural Vandalized by Heartless Terrorists
CHALET - A beautiful piece of art that the entire community can participate in was painted on Queen St. E, across the street from Swiss...
Man Donates Dreadlocks to Homeless Shelter, Claims They Are Very Warm In the Winter
ST ADNS - In an unprecedented act of kindness, Joel Williams, 54, donated virtually all of his dreadlocks to the Out of the Cold homeless...
Local Mom Feeling Cool Since Daughter Bought Same Shoes
Local Mom Sheila Cuthbert, 46, was ecstatic yesterday when her daughter came home with a set of newly purchased Blundstones. Sheila, who...
Area Man 'Stuck a Drift Too Dirty for Words'
KEW GDNS - The first large snowfall came suddenly Tuesday morning - and with it a wave of news stories. Area man Thomas Walker, 18,...
Local Man Terrified of Parking Cops
A local Beach resident was stunned when he received his second parking ticket in 2 months. “I’m not driving anymore”, said the resident...
Man Injured by Child During Kingston Road Santa Claus Parade
OUTSIDE GABBY'S - Sources confirmed that a local man was violently peppered with candy canes during the Santa Clause parade. “It was an...